I Am A Grasshopper

Are you familiar with the fable about the Ant & the Grasshopper? If you aren't, then you should read it as the title of this blog will make much more sense.

Anyway, I really identify with the grasshopper. All he wants is to be carefree, & not worry about anything other than his own momentary pleasures. That is the core of me. I am a narcissist who wants what I want without consideration for anyone else. As mewithoutYou, in January 1979, puts it, "I've grown overfed, unconcerned, & comfortably numb." Well, God is now calling me out of my "comfortable" lifestyle (or at least now I'm listening), & quite frankly, I am not that okay with it. But we, as followers of Christ, are to be blessings to others in response to the blessings He has given us. I, for one, have been hoarding all the Goods.

Over the course of the past year, God has been working on my heart. I feel He is calling me to serve the homeless. Looking back I can point to specific moments regarding this calling & confidently say, "Yep. That, there? That was God." If you know anything about me, you would be aware that I lived in the suburbs of Baltimore for many years. There, you see homeless people all the time, right outside your neighborhood, & you become desensitized toward them. I did not care about homeless people & never felt compassion for them in any way. I would think things such as, "Why can't they just get jobs?" or, worse yet, "Hey, sucks to be you, huh Buddy?!" I can't believe how terrible & uncaring I was toward them. It's a miracle I'm even recognizing God's direction on this now. This has been a very long, drawn-out process, but like I said, God's been working on my heart for (at least) the past year.

So, what am I doing about this? Glad you asked. I'm doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. I still spend $2 a day on my coffee at SBUX without batting an eye. That's more than $50 a month which could easily be used to support another child through World Vision, or perhaps increase the amount we give to our friend, Terri, as we've been supporting her through the Great Commission Ministry for several years now. But, no. I gotta have my fix. I can't believe SBUX is such a huge, spiritual issue for me. It seems I'm storing my riches in the kingdom of Howard Schultz.

I do have some good news though. I've successfully ignored God for quite some time, but I'm going to actually pick up the phone tomorrow, instead of asking Him to leave a message at the beep. Most Saturdays, a few people in our Life Group (our small group at church - going forward you may see me refer to them as either "groupies" or "lifers") go up to Long Beach to serve sack lunches & hang out with some homeless people. I will be joining them tomorrow. I must admit, I'm a little apprehensive about this. Yeah. Not really okay with this.

Well God, You called me into this, & You promise to show up when we obey, so You'd better be there tomorrow morning.