Gender Roles

For the past couple of weeks I've been thinking a lot about gender roles. It first came up when I was browsing toys for Christmas, thinking about what the kids might like. In a matter of minutes I realized I was only considering dolls & anything baby related for Charlotte. For Solomon, cars, dinosaurs & sports. Immediately upon this revelation I left the store, concluding I needed to think more about what this would tell my children.

I don't have a problem with girls wanting to play primarily with dolls, or with boys wanting to play primarily with cars. But I also don't want to have a problem with allowing my children to do the opposite. Of course I think gender identity is important. It's a part of who we are & how God made us. But should I subtly discourage my son from playing "daddy" & practicing affection with a "baby"? Or discourage my daughter from "being a football player" if that's what she wants to do? Would sticking to gender-specific toys contribute this discouragement?

This didn't sit well with me &, honestly, I still don't know how to find balance on this issue. As a parent it is my responsibility to help foster their identities. Part of finding identity involves gender. How am I supposed to do this??

(A blog I read this morning, which prompted me to blog about my dilemma, has a hilarious take on modern gender roles!)

On Loss, 3 Years Later

Tonight at life group I mentioned my baby brother Josh while explaining the number of siblings I have. I didn't go into detail, or even explain what happened. I simply said I had 4, now I have 3 as he passed away 3 years ago. Someone immediately said, "Oh, I'm so sorry!" In the moment, it didn't trigger anything. It's been 3 years. I've accepted it, coped with it. It is what it is. I didn't even acknowledge the sympathy & just continued talking. Well, on my way home it finally struck me that my brother's absence no longer really affects me. I've become desensitized. How did that happen? THAT realization crushed me.

Of course I still think of my brother. Very frequently, in fact. I still shed tears from time to time, too. I will always remember & love Josh. But I guess this is how it's supposed to be though. I mean, how can one go on living if they stay stuck on something that has happened in the past?

Right?

Priscilla

I had 2 best friends in high school. Jackie, who I affectionately call "mi negra," is still one of my BFF's to this day. Priscilla, who we called "Silla" (sometimes we'd call her "chair" too --we were in Spanish together -- "silla" is chair in Spanish), left this earth 10 years ago today.

At first I decided against blogging in her memory..... it was so long ago. But Priscilla had such a huge impact on my life. I don't know that I would've gone back to church if it weren't for her. God used her to lead me into my own relationship with Him. During this time of my life is when God became real to me. So, yeah. Priscilla really left a mark on me.

Thank you, God, for the 3 short years of friendship I got to share with Priscilla. I will continue to cherish what few memories I have of her & look forward to seeing her again when I come Home.

Christian vs. Christ-Follower

"So, what do you wear to display your Christianity?" Hahaha!!

Saw it here first (where you can find more of these vids).

Bible In a Minute

This video is hilarious!

EARTH MADE, ADAM EVE
CAIN KILLS ABEL, HAS TO LEAVE
BORING GENEALOGY
GREAT FLOOD, OLIVE LEAF

TOWER BABEL, ABRAHAM
SODOM AND GOMORRAH AND
ISAAC, JACOB, JOSEPH, MOSES
TEN COMMANDS, PROMISED LAND

JUDGES, DAVID, SOLOMON
SENT AWAY TO BABYLON
JOB, THEN A BUNCH OF PSALMS
PROVERBS AND THE SONG OF SONGS

MAJOR PROPHETS, LION DEN
MINOR PROPHETS, BETHLEHEM
GOLD AND MYRRH AND FRANKINCENSE
SATAN AND SAMARITAN

CHOOSE DISCIPLES, OTHER CHEEK
WALK ON WATER, THOUSANDS EAT
LAZARUS, FIG TREE
LAST SUPPER, GETHSEMANE

BLOOD MONEY, THIRD DENIAL
PONTIUS PILATE, PUBLIC TRIAL
FORTY LASHES, TO THE TREE
WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?

THIRD DAY, EMPTY TOMB
REAPPEARS, FIVE WOUNDS
ACTS OF THE APOSTLES NEXT
EPISTLES AND APOCALYPSE

My Praise Music is Better Than Your Praise Music

I was thinking about my grandma yesterday, probably because I saw a reference to "In the Sweet By and By" somewhere, & remembered a conversation (read: yelling match) we had in my car once. I was driving her to the store, or bank, or Taco Bell (possibly all 3) & I had one of my Five Iron Frenzy cd's playing. For those who don't know, FIF was a Christian ska band once upon a time. My grandma referred to it as crap.

"But Grandma," I said, "they're singing about/to Jesus! How can it be crap?? It's praise music!"

She responded by telling me that if it wasn't a hymn then it wasn't true praise music. Then she burst into song & clapping, "I'LL FLY AWAY, OH GLORY! I'LL FLY AWAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!! THAT'S how you REALLY praise Jesus!"

Her normal voice was loud. I'm surprised her rendition didn't shatter my eardrums. There was more to the "conversation" but this is the only part permanently seared into my mind's eye.

This probably isn't funny to most people, but it is hilarious to me, picturing her in that moment. That batty old lady.

Solomon Doesn't Play by the Fashion Rules

Now that he's older, he usually has his own ideas regarding his appearance. My opinion no longer matters. For instance, yesterday he refused to take off his jacket. No matter where we were, inside or outside. All. Day. Long. He even took a nap in it. And if he's wearing something with a hood, the hood is always up.

We're currently potty training so he goes back & forth between diapers & underwear. I keep him in underwear except when he's sleeping. But now when he wears diapers he MUST wear underwear over them. Oh, & he will only wear his underwear backwards. Because he wants to see the cartoon characters.

There are a couple of items he would wear everyday if I didn't hide them from him to be washed: his Elmo socks & his Ravens jersey. Purple & red do not look good together.

He also likes to wear his shoes on the wrong feet. I think this is more a defiance thing than an enjoyment thing though.

Islam on Capitol Hill -- A Rant

I received the below email this morning & honestly, it got me a little riled up. (Pretty long, sorry.)

September 25, 2009

Islamic Day of Prayer at the White House

Dear Friends, We received this email today and feel that it is important enough to pass along to you. We need to continue to pray for our nation like never before!

In June 2007, Presidential candidate Barack Obama declares theUSA no longer a Christian nation. In 1952 President Truman established one day a year as a National Day of Prayer. In 1988, President Reagan designated the first Thursday in May of each year as the National Day of Prayer.  This year however, President Obama, decided to cancel the ceremony at the White House not wanting to offend anyone. On September 25, 2009 from 4am until 7pm, a National Day of Prayer for the Muslim religion will be held on Capitol Hill, beside the White House. As a Christian, it makes me really wonder where the REAL direction of this country is headed.  Whether you didn't vote for the man or you did, as Christians I would surely hope that this would stir your spirit. They are expecting over 50,000 muslims that day in DC.  The website is: www.islamoncapitolhill.com Pay particular attention on the website to the bottom of the page where it states, "OUR TIME HAS COME." 2 Chronicles 7:14 says "if my people, who are called by my name,will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." becomes more important each day.  Perhaps all the things going on now in this country and around the world could be solved if we would heed this scripture.    If you feel that this is an important issue, please feel free to make your friends and family aware. If not, delete it. Just a few thoughts to ponder on. God Bless    ~If this upsets you, we have no one to blame except the Christians who haven't prayed. ~I've heard many complaints about the direction that our country is taking, many people are upset with President Obama and our government officials, but the truth is the only people to blame are we Christians who haven't chased hard after our God.  This is a spiritual battle that will become a natural battle if we don't pray.  My thoughts: First of all, why can't the Muslims have their day of prayer? This is America. Freedom of religion. If I, as a Christian, am allowed to have a day of prayer to my God, why can't a Muslim? This day of prayer isn't really "at the White House." It's at Capitol Hill. The event also hasn't in any way been organized or sanctioned by the government. It's totally independent & not really political, other than the fact that the aim is to pray for our nation. Hassen Abdellah, the organizer, stated, "Most of the time, when Muslims go to Washington D.C., they go there to protest some type of event. This is not a protest. Never has the Islamic community prayed on Capitol Hill for the soul of America. We're Americans. We need to change the face of Islam so people don't feel every Muslim believes America is 'the great Satan,' because we love America." (via snopes.com -- I went there first to check the facts as I assumed some of what this email said was misleading/misguided. The link will take you to "Islam on Capitol Hill.") So, Muslims love America. Who woulda thunk it? Abdellah's words really hit home for me. I am guilty of rarely praying for our government & country. I can't say I've uttered "I love America" very often (I do love it, for the record). I also can't say I completely disagree with Obama's statement that America is no longer a Christian nation. It's a melting pot, for sure, made up of such a vast variety of people, of which only a portion is Christian. What exactly makes a nation a "Christian" nation? If there really is a such thing as separation of church & state, then our nation shouldn't be labeled as any type of religious nation, in my opinion. I think emails like this promote fear & hatred. And I'm not sure why we Christians often feel this way. What is so threatening about this day of prayer? It isn't jeopardizing my rights, freedoms or my faith. There is no reason to fear or to hate; consider Paul's words in Romans 8, verses 28-39. No follower of Christ is ever really in danger. I'm not really sure what the beef with Obama is regarding all this either. I know he didn't have the annual Day of Prayer ceremony at the White House, but it isn't like everyone else couldn't observe it. I reiterate, Islam on Capitol Hill hasn't been endorsed or anything by the government. So I particularly have a real problem with this portion of the email: "As a Christian, it makes me really wonder where the REAL direction of this country is headed. Whether you didn't vote for the man or you did, as Christians I would surely hope that this would stir your spirit. They are expecting over 50,000 muslims that day in DC." Let them have their day of prayer. Pushing our beliefs on others does not lead them to Christ.

Confession Booth

One of my favorite writers, Jason Boyett, has posted a couple of confession blogs in the past. It inspired me to give it a whirl, to see if my soul will feel any cleaner. Also, I don't blog much anymore because I don't really have much to say these days. I blame this on Twitter & Facebook as they enable me to keep everyone updated on my minute-by-minute, oh-so-exciting life. I promise my confessions won't be nearly as funny & entertaining as JB's, so I encourage you to head on over to his blog & look around.

1. Let's start with the reason I wrote this blog: JB. Even though I refer to him as one of my favorite writers, I've never read a single book he's penned. I've only read his Relevant mag articles &, obviously, his blog & Tweets.
   
2. I like iCarly. A lot. In fact, I DVR'd it last Saturday so I wouldn't miss "iThink They Kissed." There is no reason for me to like this show. My kids are ages 1 & 3; no teens or tweens in this household. I am at least twice the age of the targeted audience. Weird? Yes.
3. I am incredibly lazy. I do nothing most of the day & then scramble at 3 o'clock, after the kids are up from their nap (totally stupid of me & inconvenient), to do a few chores before Jason (my husband -- not to be confused with the aforementioned) gets home. My house, amazingly, does stay clean though.
4. I have commitment issues. Not relationally, I am an extremely loyal friend, but just in personal pursuits. I change my mind about things a lot. For instance, I'd love to go back to school & get a Bachelor's, but I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up! Sometimes I want to continue with early childhood ed. Then I think, it would be cool to be a nurse. Or how 'bout [fill in the blank]. Then there's FlyLady. Twice I've tried fluttering with her, but I can't stick with it. Well, I could, but I'm not self-disciplined enough to do so. Those are just a couple examples. I'm fickle.
5. I lack self-discipline in general.
6. I hate exercise & love to eat. At the moment, this isn't a problem. It may catch up with me eventually though.
7. I am so judgmental & tend to be a little self-righteous, which, I imagine, is amusing to God. Or maybe more like disappointing.
8. I know for certain that God has called me into some type of homeless ministry, but I have been successfully ignoring Him for, um, what? Like 2 years now? It's easy to drown Him out with the white noise of life. I like staying within my comfort zone. Anyone who thinks following Jesus is easy has never really tried.
9. I am a wanna-be hipster. I love everything about them but I am just not cool enough to pull it off. That & I'd rather dress like an adult than a 19 year old again.
10. This one's a doozy: I voted for Obama. And I don't regret it. There. I said it. Let the verbal abuse from my family begin. I'm probably gonna get cut out of Daddy's will for that confession.

Whew! Well, glad all that's outta the way. I do feel a little lighter. Maybe I'll do this again sometime.

Happy 1st Birthday, Charlotte!

Happy 1st birthday princess! You turned one yesterday & I can't believe how quickly that day arrived. You have brought so much more joy into our lives than I thought possible & it's hard to remember life before you graced us with your presence.

You are such a Mommy's girl & I love it so much! When I hold you, you lay your head on my shoulder, wrap your tiny arms around my neck & squeeze tight. It's one of the best feelings in the world.

Knowing that I am your first role model as a woman of God, it strengthens my desire to be more godly. As you grow, I want you to know that you are so beautiful & your worth comes only from the LORD. I hope you never let society's standards convince you otherwise. I love you, my beautiful baby girl.

Happy (belated) 3rd Birthday, Solomon!

My Super Solomon,

Sorry I didn't get this post done on your actual birthday, but it's been hectic these past few weeks (especially the day of your birthday!). We settled on our very first house a week before your birthday so our time has been filled with new house business. Painting, cleaning, furniture, unpacking. Craziness! But, how many kids get to say they got a new house for their birthday? ;)

Daddy told you about 2 weeks earlier that your birthday was coming, so everyday, for 2 weeks, after you woke up from nap you would say to me, "Gonna go to birthday now??" And you would sing, "Happy birthday to Solomon!" Even for a couple of days after your birthday we had to keep explaining to you that it had come & gone & it is no longer your birthday. That must be really hard to accept at 3.

We had your party at Chuck E. Cheese's, which was your first time there. You had so much fun! You, Delilah & Larry were walking up the SkeeBall games & throwing balls in. As Aunt Erin said, "a foe sho way to win!" The pizza was awful, but I don't think you cared. We had a Lightening
McQueen cake, your favorite!

(I stole this pic from Aunt Erin's FB -- shhh, don't tell her!)

Thank you for being such a cool kid (most of the time.... when you aren't purposefully driving me crazy). You are so stubborn & undeterred. And I love those things about you (except those times I reaalllllly want you to listen to me). You never let anyone tell you what you can & can't do, & I pray you will always remember that you "can do everything through Him who gives [you] strength." [Phil 4:13] I know you will never let others define who you are, & I hope you will always find your identity & purpose in the Father alone. Things may be challenging for us during these early years of yours, but I wouldn't trade them for anything. I'm sorry I'm not the perfect mom, & I thank you for always being so forgiving of my parenting errors. God has definitely used you to reveal areas in my life where I struggle with selfishness, among other things. The LORD is using you to mold me into a better person, to better reflect His heart. So what a blessing these challenging years are! You are my Super Solomon, & I love you more than you could ever know.

Manly Man

I saw Bradley Hathaway several years ago at a show in a dirty venue in Pomona. This poem brings tears to my eyes -- especially the part about "each of my daughters will know that they are lovely & deserving of authentic romance." He also sings & looks a bit like a hippie now (I <3 hippies).

He will NOT be ignored

I tried to spend a few minutes online, you know, just to have a short moment of "me" time.... but I can't. Because Solomon is having a wicked tantrum right now. He is pulling my chair away from the computer, he actually climbed on the desk to sit between me & the computer, & he's wailing. Maybe I should feel guilty about this.

Boundaries

Sorry I haven't been blogging much lately -- so much has been going on over the past month that I haven't really had time! I plan to do a "catch up" post soon.

Anyway, so I want to talk about boundaries today & how certain people disregard them sometimes. Okay, a certain PERSON, my FIL Ed.

Back in October when Jason was home for post doc interviews, he & Ed went driving around the Frederick area as that is where we would most likely be living if/when we return to MD. (Which we did, obviously.) While there they met Paul, who would later become our Realtor. So as you can see, Ed's sort of been involved in our first home buying process since the beginning. In fact, at first Paul was solely contacting Ed about all of this. Jason quickly put an end to that.

We did not ask Ed to help us with any of this. He took it upon himself to watch the market & scope out some areas & houses while we were still in CA. He even offered to buy a house for us which we would in turn buy from him, just in case a great deal came along that we weren't ready to purchase ourselves. I truly do appreciate his desire to help us, & I know he means well, but the truth is.... I hate it.

Jason & I are adults. We've been on our own, with little to no support from anyone, for the past 5 years. We do not need assistance in buying a house. We agreed that if we could not afford what we wanted on our own we would have to settle for less of a home. Our finances are our finances. Not Ed's. Not anyone's.

Ed's very impulsive. Once in a while he would call Jason -- while we were still in CA, 3,000 miles away! -- & tell him we had to act now! The market's picking back up & interest rates are climbing again! Jason would explain to him, "It doesn't matter what the market is doing. We don't have the money for a house right now & we are across the country."

Jason has flat out told his father that this is our experience & we want it to stay just between the two of us. We don't want anyone else involved. But this past Sunday Ed ignored our demand for him to mind his own business & went behind our backs to go look at the house we decided to make an offer on.

Jason had gone over to his parents' house & Ed wasn't there. He asked Jewel where he went & she told him the truth, that he had gone to Hagerstown to meet Paul & look at the house we chose. Jason immediately called Ed & tore him a new one. He had no business contacting our real estate agent to go look at the house we want for our family. Ed was pissed at Jewel for telling Jason what he was doing, but I'm glad she did. Not only did Ed butt in where he didn't belong, he tried to hide it from us! In a way I feel betrayed.

It sounds kinda silly, I'm sure, to be so upset over this. But it isn't about a house. It's about boundaries. Ed deliberately did exactly what we told him not to do. Then tried to hide it. I'm furious with Ed, & so is Jason, but Jason said all he could to Ed so there is no need to beat a dead horse. I think Ed got the message this time. He had better anyway.

Gluttony Spelled Backwards

I swear I'm gonna gain about 50 lbs due to all this stress. It makes me want chocolate like nobody's business.

What a hectic day! Last minute we learned of a graduate yard sale where we could take our furniture to sell this morning. Yay for us! But the last minute part is what complicated things. We scrambled to take pictures of the furniture & make fliers, then Jason had to go to the lab to print them in color. Stupid Word took FOREVER & was all glitchy (stupid Microsoft - I hate you!), which caused Jason to get to the sale a half hour late. I also sent him in the opposite direction when I told him where it was being held. Oops.

He sold our couch & coffee table within the first hour, which is awesome, but it was removed from our apartment almost immediately after. I wasn't prepared for that -- I thought everything would stay put until after the sale, around 1 or so. Our friend Chris came over for lunch, as planned, but we didn't have anywhere to sit! So we had lunch on the floor, Japanese style (only with grilled cheese sandwiches & potato soup.... not so Japanese style). We still had a nice visit though! It was great catching up with him :) (We hadn't seen him in about 4 months as he went on a mission trip to Mexico.)

The downstairs area quickly became a ginormous mess as we started boxing more stuff. Then Jason had to go get his parents from the airport & take them to get their rental car, leaving me with a 2 yo who kept asking for Vóvó & Pop-pop. When they did finally get here, we just uncomfortably hung out here, due to having very little seating, & Jason & Ed continued with packing.

We met up with Jon & Molly for dinner & while we were there we learned that the timeshare my in-laws got didn't have a kitchen. Awesome. We found out earlier in the day that it was only a one bedroom, but we figured we could work around that (4 adults + 2 kids) as it has 2 double beds & a pull out sofa. No kitchen, on the other hand, is quite upsetting. I felt really bad for Ed because he did the best he could to find a place to stay here, but it's the summer & they're close to Disneyland.... the odds are against a person at this time of year & at that location. Everyone was kinda giving him grief about it & I just wish I could've told him it was alright. Maybe I can tell him tomorrow.

Another crazy day is expected tomorrow! Church in the morning (last one with ROCKHARBOR... I'm probably gonna cry :*( ), lunch, then packing, packing, packing! At least the kids will be with Ed & Jewel so we can focus on things around here.

Please pray that Jason & I will survive this week! There is light at the end of the tunnel!!

In case you can't figure it out, gluttony spelled backwards is ynottulg. Exactly.

Stressed Spelled Backwards

Today was so frickin' stressful! And poor Solomon got the brunt of it because:

Stressed out mommy + a 2 yo = DISASTER

I mostly just screamed, but he did get a spankin' or two (only for dangerous stuff though, i.e. throwing his cup at his sister -- that thing is heavy!). I probably would've been way more patient with him if I wasn't freaking out over moving stuff. I hate myself for being a screamer. Sometimes I think of my mom friends & picture them all being way more calm & patient with their kids. Then mom guilt sets in.

Anyway, so about the moving issues. We had to cancel Mayflower, the moving company I hired, which quoted us around $2,000.00 & estimated about 2,100 lbs, as Jason's new job told us we had to use the moving company they're contracted with. Yesterday a surveyor came out & quoted more than double (over $5,000.00!) & estimated 5,100 lbs. Jason said he walked through the house with the guy & told him item by item what we were keeping & what we were leaving behind & yet he wrote on there that we were taking the refrigerator. Really? He really thought we were going to take a refrigerator out of a RENTED apartment?? Jason called the actual mover today & said, "That guy is either incompetent or completely ignored me." I'm guessing it's a combination of the two. Jason then went on to tell him that we could refurnish our whole house for less than that (we did, in fact, when we first moved here, thanks to IKEA!).

After that Jason & I had to rethink the furniture & decide again what we are keeping or getting rid of so we can meet the minimum weight requirement for the moving truck. The crappiest part of all this is that I only have 6 days to sell what we aren't keeping. If we can't sell it then it's off to the dumpster (since we won't have a way to haul it to Salvation Army :( ).

Not only is it crappy that the moving arrangements aren't being made until the week before, but it's Jason's last week at work & it's the most stressful time for him! His defense is Friday, so only a couple more days, but it's killing him. I just want all of this to be over. The next 11 days are going to be hell.

Well, I'm off to eat desserts now! Maybe a piece of chocolate with my tea....

Delicious Dandelion

I finally took the time to dump our videos onto the computer. This is one of my favorites. It makes me smile every time :)

(Clearly Jason dressed Solomon that day.... he doesn't match.)

I am a Material Girl

Not really, but last night I was thinking of some things I really want. I like stuff. I like to spend money on stuff (I am my father's daughter). So here is my wish list, in no particular order:

• TOMS shoes. A real possibility, but it will probably have to wait a while. At least Solomon has a pair.
• iPhone. Yes, I am pining for an iPhone. Even if I wait until next year when Verizon carries them (assuming we stay with Verizon & the rumors of them carrying the iPhone are true), I don't think I can justify spending that kinda money on a stupid phone.
• Petunia Pickle Bottom diaper bag. I've seen several moms at church with these awesome bags! Again, sadly, I can't justify spending so much money on a diaper bag. Even at their outlet bags are still $100+. *sigh*
• Clothes. I love to buy new clothes, not just for me but for the kids too. They're fun to dress! Like life-size baby dolls (that eat & poop & cry & destroy things). The thing about clothes is that there's always something to buy. So it's sort of a never ending desire.
  
• Books. There are several books that I want to get: Crazy Love by Francis Chan, The Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne, Churched by Matthew Paul Turner, & any Jason Boyett book. There are others, but here's where I'd like to start. (I did buy a copy of Mike Erre's Death by Church a couple weeks ago at church so I'm gonna focus on that for now.)

I always have mixed feelings about wanting unnecessary things -- does anyone else or am I alone on this?? I'm constantly battling with myself, going back & forth between wanting nonessential items & thinking about all the things I could do with that money for others instead (or simply thinking of the bills we need to pay... depends on what the credit card looks like at that moment).

I don't NEED a Petunia Pickle Bottom bag, there is nothing wrong with my $30 bag from Target. I don't NEED an iPhone, my current phone works just fine. I don't NEED new clothes, I have plenty in my closet.

I still think there is more than enough room for change in my present lifestyle, to live more simply. But why does living simply have to be so difficult? Why can't it just come naturally to me??

My Beloved

I am so very proud of my amazing husband! He has accomplished so much at only 26 years old & I know he will do so much more in the years to come. Three weeks from tomorrow he will graduate with his PhD in rocket science (really it's molecular biology, but it's all the same to me so it may as well be rocket science!). He has worked so hard on his studies & research here. He has solved 3 different protein structures & co-authored 6 publications, 3 of which he is the first author.

Not to mention he has managed to do this with a somewhat demanding, & at times pain-in-the-ass, wife & two children....

While thinking about what he was going to write in his acknowledgments for his dissertation he faced a dilemma that was pretty significant considering his field. Generally speaking, scientists are not people of faith (interesting side note: of the 4 people in Jason's lab, 3 are Christians) so he felt really uncomfortable about thanking the LORD in his acknowledgments. On the one side, he could be looked down upon for making this bold proclamation as a scientist, but on the other he would be surrendering to the expectations of men, sort of being ashamed of his God. I am happy to say he decided to thank God anyway! I am so proud of him for making this decision :)

Jason loves the LORD, & I love Jason even more for that. But he is also not afraid to ask difficult questions, another thing I admire him for. They are common questions, but not easy to wrestle with, such as: Why does God allow suffering in the world? How is it just for God to send people to hell? Is God evil or good -- He has raised up entire nations only to destroy them -- how is that loving? I love that he doesn't blindly "buy into" Christianity. This attribute drives me crazy at times because I'm usually the one he discusses these things with, & my brain just doesn't function as his does. So I get frustrated.

We have been together 7 years, the last 5 in marriage, & he has proved to be a wonderful husband & father. He shares in the responsibilities at home: cooking, cleaning, finances, child care, & more. Of course I typically manage the home most of the time because I am here much more than he is & he has been so overwhelmed lately at work that I've tried to ease the burdens of home life for him. I'm not always successful in this, but I do try. He is very affectionate with our children & I love that. His own father was never an affectionate person, so it is incredible for me to watch him cuddle & kiss the kids. He enjoys giving Solomon baths & playing with him (sadly, things that are a little lower on my "Fun Things To Do" list -- I'm just a bad mom). My heart melts when I watch him interact with Charlotte; she's totally stolen his heart. He tells me all the time that I'm hot & makes me feel so beautiful, so desirable.

We bicker sometimes (what married couple doesn't?) & there are days when we don't want to be married (sometimes it's more about commitment than how we feel). We are far from perfect, but we try to keep our marriage & our home centered on Christ. Five years of marriage isn't a lot (well, maybe it is by today's measures) & we have many more years to face, fighting for our marriage & each other. I am so thankful that we both want the LORD's will for our marriage & our lives so we will be fighting together, side by side.

Thank You, God, for my beloved husband. He isn't perfect but he is perfect for me.

Liberty & the Standards of Jesus

Jason showed me today's devotional on RBC Ministries' site & I found it so profound I had to share it. As Jason said, "Oswald Chambers was a genius.... like the Mike Erre of his day." (Although I think that statement should be reversed, since Chambers preceded Erre.)

Liberty and the Standards of Jesus by Oswald Chambers
(Here's the link if you want to go to the actual page)

A spiritually-minded person will never come to you with the demand— "Believe this and that"; a spiritually-minded person will demand that you align your life with the standards of Jesus. We are not asked to believe the Bible, but to believe the One whom the Bible reveals (see John 5:39-40). We are called to present liberty for the conscience of others, not to bring them liberty for their thoughts and opinions. And if we ourselves are free with the liberty of Christ, others will be brought into that same liberty— the liberty that comes from realizing the absolute control and authority of Jesus Christ.

Always measure your life solely by the standards of Jesus. Submit yourself to His yoke, and His alone; and always be careful never to place a yoke on others that is not of Jesus Christ. It takes God a long time to get us to stop thinking that unless everyone sees things exactly as we do, they must be wrong. That is never God’s view. There is only one true liberty— the liberty of Jesus at work in our conscience enabling us to do what is right.

Don’t get impatient with others. Remember how God dealt with you— with patience and with gentleness. But never water down the truth of God. Let it have its way and never apologize for it. Jesus said, "Go . . . and make disciples. . ." (Matthew 28:19), not, "Make converts to your own thoughts and opinions."

[Emphasis mine.]