Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

Up until today, I've never been dumped by a friend. A couple of weeks ago, our communications came to an abrupt halt with no explanation. I've called numerous times during those weeks & she never called me back. Then I sent her an email last week, asking if I had done something to upset her. I went on to apologize for anything I may have done & told her that I value our friendship so if we needed to reconcile, then lets do it. Still, no reply. Finally I sent her text yesterday & that seemed to have done the trick. She replied back to my email which I got this morning. Reading it was very painful as she was such a good friend. There were a couple of statements she made that really hurt & offended me.

"As I have entered into new friendships, I have to take a look at how they are affecting my well-being."

How has our friendship been detrimental to her well-being?

"I have recently realized that I have tried to take on everyone's burdens as well as my own. I am learning that I am not able to do that anymore."

I never once forced my burdens on her. Not that we're perfect, but Jason & I are a couple of very stable people. If anything, our relationship would've required the least maintenance.

"I really need to have a group of friends that understands exactly what I'm going through and I feel like we are in different places at this time. I need space right now and it would be best for me emotionally if we didn't continue talk."

That's totally a break-up line. Based on this last comment, you would think that I was taking her to clubs & popping pills with her. Like I'm some sort of bad influence! I have many friends who are in different places in life & that does not affect my relationship with them. Why is it impossible to be there for someone who is going through a trial which you yourself have never been through? The truth is, it isn't! And again I ask, how has our friendship been detrimental to her well-being? I have been nothing but supportive & loving & I feel that it's been thrown back in my face.

I do not need this friendship, or any friendship as for that matter, to validate me. That isn't the point here, but doesn't make it less painful, that's for sure. I just feel sort of betrayed as I've poured so much into this friendship only to be rejected. (Oddly enough, that is one of the things this person struggles with - rejection. Kind of ironic that she rejected me, huh?)

Maybe I'm being completely selfish & insensitive. Maybe those are the reasons we can't be friends. Who knows? Anyway, I hope she finds whatever it is she's in such desperate need of.