Writing This Now So I Can Laugh About It Later

So I put Solomon down for his nap around 11:45. I could hear him running around in his room but thought, "Well, the later he falls asleep, the later he'll wake up, the more quiet time for me." About a half hour, maybe 45 minutes later I heard the toilet flush. I went upstairs to find him in the bathroom naked & reeking of poop. The diaper was no where to be found in the general vicinity but decided it was more important to bathe him & get him back to bed before looking for it. Once I got him situated (& the second gate up -- my first mistake was not bothering with that to begin with) I began my hunt for the poopy diaper. I found it in our room. Only there was no poop in it.

Poopy bottom + non-poopy diaper = poop somewhere else.

The pile was on our bedroom floor, but it didn't stop there. Oh no, it kept going. It was smeared on our closet door, the comforter & all over our sheets. I cleaned up the mess & hopped in the shower. While I was in there I could hear loud thuds just outside the door. I knew he couldn't have gotten out with the door being double gated so I could only conclude he was throwing stuff. What, I didn't know. He got into the diaper changing cabinet (again! Why have I not installed those stupid locks yet??) & was throwing the little bottles of soap & stuff over the gate. I gathered all the items & put them in my room & sent him back to bed.

A few minutes later I heard a loud thud upstairs. I went back up & he had somehow reached the lotion on the top of the diaper changing table (how the heck did he reach that??). It was splattered all over the carpet & few spots elsewhere & Solomon was rubbing globs of it on his fresh shirt that I had just put on him! (Coincidentally it was his "Mr. Messy" shirt.) "Losin," he kept repeating to me while lubricating his shirt.

If only I had already installed the cabinet locks. If only I had I double gated the door. When will I learn???